I’ve been kicked, punched, promised, robbed, underpaid, under appreciated, overworked, lied to and overlooked.  The only reason I stay in this bloody place is to see what happens next.

Lord, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to hide the bodies of those people I had to kill because they pissed me off.

God put me on this earth to accomplish a certain number of things.  Right now I am so far behind I will never die.

Three quarters of the earth’s surface is water and only one quarter is land.  The good Lord’s intentions are very clear….  A mans time should be divided ¾ fishing, ¼ work.

We the unwilling, led by the unqualified have been doing the unbelievable for so long with so little we now attempt the impossible with nothing.

                                  Attention - All staff

                 Unless morale improves the beatings will continue!!!

                          Notice to all Employees 

Due to increased competition and a keen desire to stay in business, We have been forced to inaugurate a new policy.  Effective immediately we ask that sometime between starting time and quitting time and so as not to interfere too much with the time now spent in lunch periods, rest periods, coffee breaks, ticket selling, story telling, and the re-hashing of last night’s TV programs, that each employee find some time which can be set aside.                        This we shall call ‘The work break’